Anguished hiker sues habitual blobsquatcher: "Can't see the trees for the red circles!"

"Can't...get...away..."

 
52-year-old outdoor enthusiast Martin Powell has filed a lawsuit against "bigfoot researcher" Steven Hoyt Marcum for allegedly ruining his enjoyment of nature's rich pageant.  Powell is seeking damages in excess of $100,000.00 for mental cruelty and suffering at the hands of the blobsquatcher for exposing him to "Red circles, arrows, and figure outlines" that he insists he now can't get out of his mind when walking through the woods.  When questioned about the charges outside of the Muhlenberg County, KY courthouse, an enraged Marcum responded "They're everywhere!  I've always seen them!  Are you blind?!?! There's one NOW!" whereupon he produced a tube of red lipstick and drew a circle on the forehead of reporter Randy Fox.